Different steps of sexual “abnormality”
Saturday (May 23rd, 2009) in Bucuresti it was the diversity march, where sexual minorities (in numerical minority compared to order forces) marched expressing in their own way, which I personally find quite funny and interesting, but not vulgar. To compare, after the minorities’ demonstration ended, I saw at Unirea subway a group of football supporters who cried loudly, sang with brutal voices, and when a passenger complained about their aggressive behavior in a public place he was insulted. The question is: what is the opinion of the organizations Provita, Families Alliance in Romania and Romanian Orthodox Forum, who prepared a counter-demonstration against diversity march, named normality march, about these noisy supporters? Are they less noxious than gays and lesbians for the education of children who see them manifesting? They are normality…
Having in view that violence and war (because this is what supporters do, they behave like at war, they simulate a little war, or more gentle said, like rival gangs, the psychological mechanisms that govern their behavior are the same) were important factors in the history of the human society, they represent normality. Some experts even consider that there was a positive selection in increasing violence, a fact that is very easily found in some human societies (for example Ute Indians, described by Lorenz). Violence is normal, but for the sexual point of view, are these people liked by these organizations which fight for normality? Are they really heterosexual?
From anus to passionately suicide
To answer these questions we should define homosexuality, but also heterosexuality. And things are not as easy as they seem at first sight. Most of the time, when thinking about homosexuals, people reduce their sexual behaviour to anal sex at men, which seems very disgusting, or to clitoris stimulation at women. Unfortunately this happens in Romania at high level. In a tv show at Realitatea Tv Friday, Adrian Paunescu, once called by Radio Profm the biggest poet alive, exclaimed at some point ” what normality? Normality through anus?”. If this is the level of a poet, what to expect from other people? Homosexuality does not mean sexual attraction, the availability to have sex with individuals of the same sex, but the availability to have romantic relationships with a certain sex. A research made several years ago shows that bisexual individuals can have sex with both sexes, but the availability for romantic relationships is with one sex only. This means that a bisexual woman is really attracted affectively to one sex only, women or men; the same goes for a bisexual man. It is also known that there is male prostitution practiced by heterosexual men, who have sex homosexually, but only for money, without emotional implications, the sexual attraction does not exist in this case. About female prostitutes it is known that they are often lesbians, this is why it is easy for them to do this, because they do not involve emotionally, not even as sexual attraction.
Homosexuality means more than sexual relations between individuals of the same sex, it means affection, passion, crimes, and passionate suicide. Any good person would suffer when hearing about the existence of a society which denies the right to marriage of two heterosexual individuals, as it happens in India, when people are from different castes. But if there is about prejudice, in the country that should be the biggest economic power of the world, the European Union, the situation is even more striking, it is judicially settled. And Romania is a European Union country…
Probably in no other culture except for the occidental one, partners involved in marriage do not have more rights, which make many heterosexuals reticent in signing such contract. Homosexuals who want to give these privileges to someone do not have this possibility. In a society which pays that much attention to conjugal relations, in which the husband/wife has direct access to goods, life insurance, children conceived or adopted during this relation (even if they aren’t his), homosexual relations are seriously discriminated. Don’t they have the same rights to personal life that heterosexual have?
Homosexuals’ sincerity
Several years ago, after a discussion I had with my aunt, who is now 85 years old, she was surprised by the attention that media gave to homosexuals. “Why are there so many talks about homosexuals? Big deal! Romanians were half homosexuals…” Homosexuality does not start in Antiquity and does not start at the human being. The homosexual behavior was observed at many animal species, starting with reptiles, to other mammals and birds (for example geese). It is very interesting that at pigmy chimpanzees, bonobo, Pan Paniscus, considered the closest species to man, even closer than the common chimpanzee, Pan Troglodytes, homosexuality, especially the female one, is very extensive. Their sexual behavior is very much alike the human one. Not only these funny primates have sex out of the reproductive period, more precisely they have sex for pleasure, females’ orgasm being typically human, masculine type, but their lack of sexual prejudices does not stop here. Bonobo females, beyond the extraordinary imagination of positions, they often have lesbian sexual relations, which have a special social role, strengthening the friendship relations between females within the group. At humans sex has also a big social role, the importance that many cultures give to nuclear family is a proof of that. Anyway, probably the prejudices that exist in many cultures, including ours, do not allow people to manifest their “real sexual face”.
It seems that Antiquity was more sincere form this point of view, and from other points of vew. Beyond Romans’ homosexuality, exercised during many campaigns, the homosexuality of Greeks was even better known. During Athenian democracy homosexuality prevailed among superior sections of population, in fact at Athenians. The question is: Why so many homosexuals in Antiquity? Why at present they aren’t so many? Perhaps homosexuality has slightly different proportions in various populations, although I don’t know much about this, but its proportion must have been very different from the present one. We do not have a clear picture of the real dimension of homosexuality in the Athenian society. Nevertheless the sexual relations that mattered were the relations between males. In a society which attached much value to culture, physical and spiritual formation, married women were illiterate, their role being reproductive. The only females that existed from the sexual attraction point of view were… courtesans, well-educated and interesting women.
Konrad Lorenz, the famous ethologist, Nobel Prize winner, makes the difference in “The so-called evil”, a book about aggressiveness between the homosexuality of the young man wearing make-up and that of the Greek heroes, like Achilles and Patrocles. He describes homosexuality at wild geese, where males often make successful couples, which due to force and communication between partners occupy high positions in hierarchy, being more successful than heterosexual relations. At geese, the pairs which are formed based on the triumph cry (something familiar to those who lived in the country and observed geese) are very stable, most of the time for the entire life. The relationship between the two ganders is very much alike the homosexual relations between the Greek heroes. Lorenz also says that sexual relations at the wild goose, like at humans, are the natural consequence of a good affective relationship, while the reverse is not true. In this case, the homosexuality of ancient Greeks or of Romans was the natural result of very good relations. When communication between sexes was slack, male homosexuality and the female one as well, was the solution for good emotional relations. In all the societies where communication between sexes is slack there appears the homosexuality. Sultans often had lovers, despite their harems of…lesbians, for the same reason.
Is the situation different now? No, just the taboos are different. Psychologists say the homophobes are often repressed homosexuals. The supporters I met feel very well in the presence of other males, their female partners being used just for reproduction and housekeeping. Their life, what makes them feel good, what represents them, is beside their friends, other males. For many women the situation is not different. Their life is beside their girl friends, the reason they married being the social conventions. I was shocked by the confession of a young woman in this regard. When her husband went in a mission, she was left alone, which made her “really feel alive”. When asking her why she married, she answered that because of her parents, because of social conventions. She obviously preferred my company. Nothing new. Our recent ancestors several hundred years ago had separate lives, women with other women chattering, and men at the bar with other men. Conjugal partners were used for economic purposes, procreation, and something that today we would hardly call sex.
Can these people be called heterosexual? Like ancient Greeks, they are not able to have emotional relationships with their partners, who are different psychologically, which creates much more communication problems than between individuals of the same sex. Like Lorenz’s homosexual ganders which have sexual relations very rarely, and they can couple with females, which sometimes form a ménage- a- trois, keep their availability of being attracted strictly sexually to individual of different sex. Homosexuals are superior to these people through their sincerity and honesty. They do not use just the opposite sex individuals for mean purposes. The sexuality object is the same with the affection object. Can one be called heterosexual when the opposite sex induces just a sexual excitation based on signal stimulus?
The courage of real heterosexuality
What is reproached to homosexuals by well-educated and tolerant people is the fact that they seem to lack imagination and selfish, because they are able to invest emotionally only in similar individuals. Ayn Rand, the creator of a philosophic system which she named objectivism, blames homosexuality for this kind of reasons, considering that romantic relations are possible only between individuals of different sex. But if we follow these criteria, how many people really are heterosexual? It seems logical that romanticism be a big adventure, the object of these relations be individuals not only of different sexes, but different culturally, genetically etc. Unfortunately, these investigations are expensive from every point of view; they require a lot of strength and courage. Real heterosexuality is for the strong, tolerant, patient, gentle, who accept challenges and risks. Most of the people, according to researches, choose similar partners, even physically, not only culturally, and who live nearby. What would happen if there weren’t any taboos related to homosexuality?
Where does homosexuality come from?
However, if we explained the Achiles phenomenon, how could we explain the phenomenon of “the young man wearing make up”? if based on the data above we can promote the theory that bisexuality could be rather ordinary, meaning that many people would accept, based on emotional relations, having sex with individuals of the same sex, there are real homosexuals who feel attracted sexually and emotionally only to individuals of the same sex. Psychologists say that there aren’t peer reviewed articles which show that homosexuality is innate, as some claim. Unfortunately there are not many researches regarding sex, not as many as it should, because of prejudices. These researches require financing, and many are reluctant in financing researches about sex. Psychologists say that homosexuality is a consequence of deficient psychological development in the first childhood, between 3-5 years of age, when the child learns to attribute his parents’ roles. If the parent of the same sex is absent, he takes the role of the parent of the opposite sex. Is it???
Even if the data for refuting this are precarious, still there are some. Within a feature report broadcasted on Discovery, I saw the disastrous consequences of this approach. After a birth accident, a baby boy suffered a sex change operation and then he was raised like a girl. Everything was supposed to be normal because every child is born without a distinct sexualisation of the brain which appears subsequently as a consequence of environmental factors. Although some data showed that testosterone treatment during the intra-uterus development of female mice changed their sexual behavior after birth… The life of that child became a nightmare. The role of girl made him very unhappy, his adaptation became very difficult. Eventually he found out the truth. And by the end of the feature report he committed suicide…
The theory about homosexuality that I did not present in “The civilization…”, but I presented the collateral reasoning, is a very simple one (I should write a scientific article about this!). This would be a problem of the intra-uterus development pace. At the human being intra-uterus development time is altered, meaning there are stages that are dilated very much, if we compare to other mammal species. On the other side, there are data which indicate that antenatal stress makes the female brain think like a man and the male one think like a female. I saw this kind of situation. A transsexual female thought this situation was based on an accident her mother had before her birth. Probably things are a little more complicated. Briefly, sexual organs are formed in a development stage, much earlier, while the brain develops subsequently, in the last trimester of pregnancy. Homosexuality and transsexuality would be another time artery of the brain development. In fact, the difference between the male brain and the female one would be of this kind, a slightly different investment in some structures as a consequence of slightly different development paces. Certain antenatal conditions, supported of course by a genetic predisposition, could modify the development pace and brain sexualisation. In support of this theory is the fact that certain facts related to brain development, such as lateralization, are similar at heterosexual women and gay men on one hand, but at lesbians and heterosexual men too. So, there are similitudes of brain organization at heterosexual women and gay men, but at lesbians and heterosexual men too, probably due to a consequence of the development conditions. In this case homosexuality and transsexuality would be the result of the presence of sexual organs specific to one sex and of brain sexualisation specific to the other sex. A contradiction between the sex of the brain and the sex of the genital parts.
So, at least in some cases, the homosexual behavior is decided before birth. On the other hand, some researches suggest that being raised in a gay family does not change the sexual orientation of children towards the general population. So, in this case the theory of the influence of parents` role in defining the sexual orientation of children is off. But the history suggests other solutions for reducing the percentage of homosexuality within a population. After the disappearance of Athenian democracy, the woman´s role in family and society changed, relations between sexes modified, there appeared feminine representations in art. Why? Men did not spend any more time in agora with other men; they spent more time in family, communication between sexes improved. Perhaps the advocates of patriarchal traditionalism don`t know, but the values they promote encourage gay behavior, and the reduction of their influence in society could bring some changes, at least in some cases, described above.
And the fact that marriages between gay individuals are not legalized because they do not lead to giving birth to children is hilarious. Most of the time humans have sex for pleasure, not for reproduction. On the other hand, the human being can be defined as the species which does things that are not necessary for the survival of the individual or of the species (definition from “The civilization….”). So, marriage between gay individuals is as…human as it can be. It´s time family was not just a form of prostitution anymore, at least not in all cases, as Soviet educator Makarenko described it. This is what patriarchal family is, far from being saint for a man who respects human rights . In 21st century we should give family a chance to be the place for people who want to be happy, who try to exercise the right to search for happiness…
The knowledge of little Titulescu
Some time ago I read an article in Romanian media about a legislative initiative of Mr. Ponta, according to which a new amendment will be introduced into the Criminal Code which stipulates that therapeutic abortion after 24 weeks of pregnancy becomes a felony because, he said that after this age abortion becomes murder, as the foetus is considered a person. What did he rely on when saying that? Nobody knows, but him. After the biologic knowledge, nobody can say exactly in what stage of development -pre or even post native, there appears the quality of human being. I have written about this in “When human life begins”.
Human or Neanderthalian? Just a child…
I remember a discussion I had several years ago (in 2005) with a colleague, anthropologist with over 30-year experience in the field. It was about a recent controversy at that time, related to the possibility that some hybridizations could have been made between the man of Neanderthal and modern human. The discovery of a child who had both the characteristics of a modern human and of a Neanderthalian, led to this controversy. Of course, the person who discovered him considered he was a hybrid. But things are not so simple in the field, as it may look like at a first glance. My colleague said that the individual who was in course of development is simply “a child”, about who we do not know if he was a hybrid or if he belonged to one of the two species. “He was a child”.
It may look like a simple thing, but those who are not experts in the field do not know that human babies (children) do not have yet many of the typically human characteristics. The thorax of little children is similar to the chimpanzee one; it is not flat like the one of a mature person. Also, the position of hyoid bone, an important human feature, with an important role in articulated language, is not the position it has at the adult that is lower, position which settles around 12 years of age. But the fact that the big toe, which is opposable at new-born children like at chimpanzees was also mentioned in biology books (when evolutionism in Romania was taught in schools). In other words, the younger children are, the closer they are to our kindred, the big primates. It would be interesting to see how those who deny evolution explain this…We do not have a clear definition of human biologic condition, so we cannot know when human life really begins. Anyway, it is obvious that not before birth. We do not have any sign that symbolic thinking which is considered a typically human feature, perhaps the feature which has the best chances to define human condition, appears before birth. Symbolic thinking is what makes speaking, human type communication possible.
Tradition which blames depending on the possession of a uterus
Where do Mr. Ponta’s ideas come from? If is not from science, then from tradition. It seems that sometimes tradition is more important than science when it comes to influencing political decisions. And we are not in Afghanistan or Iran. Unfortunately, although most of the Westerners revolt when they hear about women’s situation in Islamic fundamentalist countries, they do not realize that tradition oppresses western women too. We are not talking about the fact that interdiction of therapeutic abortion means sentencing women to death. The initiator of this amendment says that some medical exceptions will be included within the law. But any interdiction of abortion, irrespective of the pregnancy period it refers to, represents violating woman’s rights. Bashfulness regarding sexuality, in this case feminine bashfulness, even in western culture, leads to numerous abuses. Interdicting abortion means sentencing someone if not to death and cripple after an illegal abortion, to life sentencing when giving birth to an unexpected child. Would you sentence someone to prison for life for having free consented sex? Bringing to world an undesired child is similar. Those who speak about limiting the right to abortion, have they talked to a woman who gave birth to an unexpected child? Do they know what her life becomes after that? The woman, who is often lonely or involved in a bad relationship, will not have her own personal life anymore, her career will be ruined, if she has one, if not- her poverty and despair will worsen. Our society which emphasizes freedom condemns half of the population to having a life programmed to pregnancy, just because she has uterus.
The woman should be the only one to decide when she wants to give birth to a child. Nobody can oblige a sportsman to participate in a very tough competition if he is not prepared, or a mountaineer to do a risky climbing if he is not ready, a pilot to pilot when he cannot concentrate, or simply a man to buy a house or a car when he is not prepared. Despite all these, some people consider obliging a woman to enter in a very risky and challenging investment for life. Would somebody dare asking someone, if not a woman, to make a dangerous surgery which would result in loosing his teeth, and other health problems that appear after a complete pregnancy? I don´t think so. Then how can anyone ask a woman to give birth when she is not ready or simply she doesn´t want to?
There are women who just don´t want to have children. Women did not come into the world to procreate, their contribution to the society development can be very important, without involving their uterus in this affair. A friend of mine, D.S., said something intelligent regarding this matter, declaring that an unexpected pregnancy is worse than a rape. Having in your uterus a child that is not wanted is more painful than being raped, psychological effects are even more tough… And to think that in some European countries, UE members, like Ireland and Poland abortion is illegal, and in others like Lithuania it is limited, even if it is therapeutic…What do these countries have in common? Catholicism…Those who militate against abortion do not want to kill children, but they want to kill women or at least their lives. It is also blamable that in some countries where there are many Catholics, like Germany, church interferes in counseling women who want to abort, trying to make them change their minds. If this does not happen, women remain, beyond physical trauma, with a feeling of guilt. Although I often consider that prison is a very tough penalty for human faults, I would sentence to prison someone who blames somebody for trying to keep his right to life.
Women cannot be reduced to uterus, not even from the sexual point of view.
Women cannot be reduced to uterus, as some try to do. Some time ago, a psychologist friend of mine, Dan, after a discussion about nationalism, brought the ideea that fanatic nationalists have a certain morbid relation with thei mothers. He have given several examples of fanatic nationalists from the Romanian political world, who had some veneration for thei mothers, althoug normally they are vulgar misogynists. They assimilate the country with the mother, thus being obsessed by the fact that their mothers or women who carry their genes be raped by strangers, meaning the genes of other heirs.
If we think about history, about the Athenians´ attempt to have a pure race between the walls of their fortress, his theory seems very likely. But he also says that these fanatics maim women, because they are more than mothers, first of all hey are able to feel a great pleasure. We could say that until the uterus women have a lot more things in their genital parts that are important. Women are humans too, meaning they have sex for pleasure, which sometimes can lead to unexpected pregnancy. Religious fanatics should ask themselves why God made women feel so much pleasure, if they have to behave like some nuns who are only allowed to procreate.
According to their theory, everything has a purpose. Which is the purpose of the feminine sexuality, different from other primates? The females of our species, like the bonobo ones (Pan Paniscus) have a specific type of orgasm, a masculine type. This is one of the misterious human features. There were several theories about the female orgasm at the human species. Actually, their evolutionary role, which according to the theory of evolution must lead to fitness development, meaning to survival through descendants, still remains unknown. There were several theories, from the sperm suction (which takes place also without orgasm) to pairing with several males, who in this way were confused about the paternity, which would have prevented the killing of children. In “Civilizatia foametei” an original theory is presented, which lacks teleology more than any Darwinian attempt of explaining it. According to this, the appearance of feminine orgasm has a “very noble” origin, being related to the development of other important organs. Additionally, at human and at bonobo, sex has a very big social role.
To conclude, we, the Westerners, should not revolt when we hear about the way women are treated in Islamic fundamentalist societies. The difference between us and Moslem fanatics is not big: we do not cover and sequester women, but we take their right to life and happiness. Scientists would also want to impose their ideas in the society, but the “scientific Talibans”, people who lead their life after the scientific discoveries, would not use tricks, like tradition advocates.
Those who suffer for “”the souls of unborn children” could save souls that are already born, like adopting children from Bangladesh or India or even more simple “to adopt” adults in hell, meaning to marry persons from countries of the third world, where there is no democracy, human rights are not observed and there is no hope in general. Both variants are less challenging and risky than bringing to world an unexpected child. Some atheist militants of the right to abortion do not exclude these possibilities…. Fortunately, on our planet we also have decent politicians, who have positive points of view regarding the right to abortion. Congratulations to Mr Obama for that!
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